Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Kolej Mara Banting

After receiving some encouragingly touching responses for my previous post about footballing life in banting, I was inspired to blog on Banting.


3 years since I left KMB, where I spent 2 years doing IB.

IB? Apatu?

They said: IB = International Baccalaureate.

I thought: IB described the fish in the canteen rightly: Ikan Batu.

Food in KMB.

Till today, I still remembered the taste of the food in KMB. Other than the IB, the food as a whole, seriously, was acceptable.

The IB, i mean the fish, is genetically modified with ribosomes of stones conjugated with diamond. If you throw it to the cat and kena the cat's head, it can be pronounced dead on the spot.

(actually i forgot the taste of the fish already, coz after first semester, I have free food everytime in the cafe, due to my business ties with the cafe. HAHA)

Actually I like the food in KMB. I mean where in the world u can find free food, just take, eat, after finished then throw? no need to wash, no need to pay, and then sapu sapu punggung, belah.

Rules and Regulations in KMB? Are meant to be broken la...

"The most important thing i brought to KMB, is not my underwear, nor my porn cd, but its you." said Eric/Ang to Ang/Eric.

On the first day, Eric and I were given our room number.

We were separated into different blocks. We did not get into the same room. But, the years of training in PFS proved to be extremely useful, just on the first day in KMB.

He moved into my room, and we told my "supposingly" roomate: "Mr Sim, that we were told to change room."

Then, around an hour later, one of the warden, I still remembered him: Mr Ali, knocked on our door with Sim and said: "You know you guys are not supposed to change room as you like?"

We then told Mr Ali that Mr Tamam, the chief warden allowed us to do that. He bought that.

After that, Mr Tamam came to my room. He said to Eric: "You are not supposed to be here". And then to me: "Where is your supposing roomate?"

With the ultimate muka innocent, just like the kucing on the verge of kena raped by a pariah dog, we told him that Mr Ali agreed to let us change. He looked at us and he asked: "Betul?"

Sekali lagi: just like what we learnt in Choral Speaking and Drama Society back in PFS, we spoke in perfect timing and honestest facial expression, "Yes sir, seriously".

So, we ended up in the same room.

The great B125

A week after that, another problem came. Our matriculation card. The room number in the card is according to the registry, in which we are not supposed to be roomate.

Again, our experience in Kelab RekaCipta was put in good use. We collected my "supposingly" roomate's card, and together with eric's card, we went to the office, and told the office clerk, that there were mistakes in the card.

HAHA: the brother in the office did not ask anything else and just reprint the card for us, and also change the number in the registry.

From that day onwards, B125 was officially occupied by two of the most outstanding, outsitting and outsleeping human in Block B.

The Roomates of the year

And, not long after that, we made one of our earliest friend in the same corridor, Mr Ihsan.

Liban teaching how to make bomb...

Every time he went Surau, he would walk past my room, in his usual Taliban outfit and thus, earned himself the first nickname from us: Liban.

And before long, my neighbour, a super farter who redefined the world record of farting rate, in my room, 9 farts in a roll, and paling best, he was sitting on my pillow.

Nizam and farter

Nah, the bonus, one and only one, the Banting Orientation song written by Eric Koay and Ang Choon Seong when they were first week in KMB, not for public viewing.

Kementerian Penerangan's tontonan rating: 75PL

(Adapted from Larger Than Life!)

People run and hide when you screaming the name: ALI...

Bangun pagi pegi dewan tak mau punctual..mau...EARLY...

Lewat sekali......

Pum...ping...berkali kali kali kali yeah!

All you people can you see, can you see...

Mr Azmi tak tau bawak Lori..

Everytime he drives

Dia langgar babi

and that....makes.....K....M....B....

No BABI...

tek tek tek tek...tek nek tek nek..


tek tek tek tek...tek nek tek nek...

Yes IB!

If you are offended pls come and kill me.)


ihsan_huhu said...

b125 : pusat pengumpulan dan penyerbaran bahan2 porn blok B

kores said...


b123: pusat bela tikus tanpa bulu

.:kAi:. said...

hahaha ... weh, u dun want to write about our penolong pengetua. sapa nama dia. the one who was so obssessed with people who coupled.

Sir Ashcroft said...

Best IB song yet.

aliyamustapha said...

hahaha!! hilarious post! dah lama tak dgr from you lar ang!

Anonymous said...

should i accept the ib programe??is it very tough??

Sricandy's Hubby said...

haha hey...my super super superjunior.. i was there in block b as well.. cant remember my room number but it was the end lot room ground.

yes.. one of the best moment when i was in IB Banting..proud to be Ib'ans ..

still the remember the thrill over the weekend when everybody raced to the bustop to wait for a 1-hour-once bus to go back to KL or to go to banting town for outing.. haha..

Muhamad Hazwan said...

Damn,I'm a first year in KMB and I'm residing in B125 too!