Sunday, December 30, 2012
Ha ha ha not this year! I must learn to be more serious!
2012 has been a funny year to me indeed. Joy and laughter were abundance, the unfamiliar tears and confusion were surprising re-emerge out from no where.
Completed housemanship with little happening.
Nonetheless, I am now a registered medical practitioner.
Unable to find a field that I really interested, I just, as usual, follow the flow.
Found myself in Cardiothoracic Surgery.
While I dont believe that life is actually a box of chocolate and that you would never know what you gonna get, I do believe that you need to think more of what is the easiest way of solving problem.
My new favourite saying is that Life is like a Cho Tai Dee game.
You might get the good cards in hand. Dont be too happy yet because if doesnt win, the anguish is there.
If you win, so what, next round you might not get the good cards anymore.
If you get all the bad cards, you can still be happy. You might lose, no doubt, and actually that might be a sure thing, but you could still, strive to lose it the winning way. By making the best out of what you have been given.
Synthetic happiness as Dan Gilbert puts it succintly in Pursuit of Happiness.
I hope the lessons I learnt, the people I met and the mistakes I done;
would not repeat in 2013, or 2014, or 2015.
Dont put all eggs in one basket.
Perhaps put the eggs in the fridge la would be safer.
Happy New Year people.
*May you find your happiness.
See you next year!
Saturday, December 29, 2012
That would at least burnt off the calories I collect for the first half of the day feeding at work.
I am serious.
Need proper cycling track, but I guess it has to start somewhere isnt it!
Never say never!
The change is sizeable I must admit, from the patients' disease spectrum, expectations, understanding and social background to my colleagues and seniors' working attitudes, clinical competence, career progression, team support and ethics.
I see little benefits in discussing about the quality of houseman, insufficient training resources for post-graduates doctors, or even the national healthcare system when we are not doing much in addressing the core component of the problem - Politicking policy-making.
The major difficulty in delivering good healthcare is the lack of the will to address the flaws in our system rather than not having a good system.
It is not unknown to us that our policy makers are mostly not feedback-friendly and taking negative comments on the system and policies in placed as mischievous and uncalled for.
Nothing saddens me more than hearing a senior personnel brushing off a complaint of our inadequacy with: "that is how the system works", or "please work within the system", and then paradoxically advise us to "express our discontentment in the suitable in-system's channels in placed"
We are in Malaysia whereby five out of ten decisions are flip-floppy mainly due to the over politicking policy making. I am being very nice to give that figure of 5 in 10.
Inconsistency is the most consistent feature in our system. You will never know what the system would be like, in the next 2 years.
Two years ago, the ministry came out with the system that all Peninsular doctors who agreed to serve the East Malaysia where doctors are most needed, would be granted priority in transferring back to Peninsular hometown after their two years service and new doctors from Peninsular would be sent there to take over and then cycles continues on.
A very well intended system to address the issue of getting healthcare to places that needs the most. Well done.
But what happens in reality? The transfer is happening to a certain extent, but it is not all according to plan.
Again the sadness of our Malaysia system, like in all other sectors, those who refuse to transfer and have powerful connections or knows how and who to complain will be able defy the system.
When there is no replacement coming through, there is little choice for the local administrative but to give sweet promises to the current batch to work a little longer.
There is a saying among the rural doctors: Don't make your life more difficult in exchange of making those who sits in office's life easier
I opines that policies involving healthcare should not succumb to unfair treatment.
We doctors pledged to give equal treatment to all, not to selected few who has education or who has money and it is only fair that we should be treated the same by the system.
We must strive to have a system in placed whereby everyone will have to, and happily to respect the system, and there is no cutting corners, jumping queues or different queues for different people.
That should be our aim.
For my esteemable policy makers; your job does not end with the issuance of a Pekeliling of your carefully crafted well intended system: you must make sure it is adhered to: fully and not only to those who are willing to follow.
Will patient be any more happy in having a sad, angry and unmotivated doctor in comparison to having no doctor?
Of course in politics of policy making, numbers is more important.
There are a lot of us who is willing to serve in wherever we are needed.
But it saddens me when some are here and stuck due to a Janji tidak Ditepati.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Ya the exam this January.
and of course, the other thing in January as well.
well well, 2012 is definitely year to remember. No wonder the Mayan chose this year as THE special year.
2013 would answer the 2012's mystery.
Election as well.
Ha ha ha. If everything happens for a reason
Nothing happens, also for a reason.
Ang He Don Ya.
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
I am taking exam in January, in Spore.
Oh well, there is nothing to hide, but at the sametime there is nothing to announce la.
I famously say this before: When I have no one to talk to, I talk to the world.
The reason why I took this exam is simple.
I felt my medical knowledge is too poor.
Not good enough for me to work as a normal doctor.
Because there are so many things I have never heard of.
Not many believe when I say I didnt study at all in Medical School.
Oh well, really one. Hahaha...I actually dont know what I did in Med School.
All I know is that, 3000 is not a big sum of money to pay to at least, for the first time of my life, looking at the patient's notes and medication chart: Aha! I know what I need to do!
:) Good luck Ang Choon Seong.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Been trying to write about this for sometime, actually since last year but always forgot.
Now it is very simple to me.
Teach in BM or English also can.
There is nothing more stupid for a policy maker to make a policy, citing all the reasons and factors studied as they like to say: Study extensively, spending our millions in organising taskforce, meetings and etc, inviting hundreds of experts in certain fields,
and came out with some suggestions that doesnt work in practice, in reality.
When Mahathir turned everything into English at his last speech in UMNO AGM, i think it was 2002, I still can remember that scene as I was catching the event live on TV3, everyone understand where he came from.
He sees English as the international language, and the whatever kepentingan nusa and bangsa about Bahasa Malaysia should not be overated till it makes our people weaker and more incompetent.
Truly a visionary man.bold decision.
tick and tock, 6 years later..policy abandoned.
Some says that this policy is causing the drop of the performance among the rural Malay students who are unable to grip the language well to even start to learn in that language.
Back to square one ( English as the teaching language in 1970s - then changed to BM as part of the push for patriotism I supposed)
That is just plain stupid.
The logic is simple, in choosing which language you wanna teach whatever.
EVALUATE YOUR TEACHER FIRST.
if your teachers, who cant even speak proper English, (a truth that everyone have to swallow, a huge huge number of our graduates from the best univeristies in Malaysia - UM, UKM, USM - cant speak proper English)
then what about the quality of English of teachers from our Maktab perguruan?
If they cant speak English properly, and the policy is for them to teach in English:
then, god bless you.
btw, Merry Christmas.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
He was camping outside the Dataran Merdeka, part of the prostest against PTPTN.
In what way we are developing our sense of nationhood?
People in power should understand that it is not easy to find young minds like Umar who would go to that extent displaying activism for a public cause.
And whatever they do, be it right or wrong, is only for the country. We must respect that belief and stand.
This is not about which political leanings you are.
Are we all satisfy with all our students and young minds be like me, just blog on my opinion, join some political party and campaign once awhile?
Are we all happy with our young generation choosing writing letter of complaints according to as they said the "appropriate channels", and sees it as the end of our duty as the next generation to shape our own country's future?
Are we all content with our entire generation be passive and say AI, whenever our politicians come and shake our hands?
The main issue why most of us are not joining politics actively is the system, which was seemed okayed by so many people for some many years.
It is depressing for me.
It is seemingly true that there is other than syok sendiri and financial gains, there is none to gain, in joining and striving to be a successful politician, in a system like ours,
whereby party policies are driven by racial sentiment, voting in Parliament are according to whip and saying things against your coalition is deemed inappropriate and frown upon and would be witchhunted!.
The people voted you in, not the PM voted you in. You owe them. Not your political party.
Of course thats not possible isnt it?
The system is like that, means like that la.
Shame on you for saying this and then stand proud as the Yang Berhormat.
As for Umar, thank you.
Like you dad;s message: Dunia Belum Kiamat, Berjuang Hingga Tamat.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Very interestingly she commented that how can he only get C for a language that he speaks everyday?
Spurred me to write about this very wrong feeling of perceived advantage among some of the chinese people that I have spoken to long time ago, whom detest my inability to speak in my mother tongue language.
I have no shame to be a Malaysian first, and actually only, no chinese second or malay second. Those are racial identity not citizenship, unless you have two citizenship then you can say you are Japanese second or whatever. I actually see no sense in any of the politician's proclaimant that they are Malay first then Malaysian second. Nonsense.
The fact is no one can take away from is that you are a rightful citizen of this country. Same to all the others, be it Chinese, Malay or Indian.
Back to the topic of UPSR BM grade C.
The funny thing is that there are some people who think that the subject BM is easy for the Malays and difficult to Chinese or Indians because we dont speak in that language.
Unless the particular Malay boy/girl comes from a very weird background who only speaks in Malay Baku, he or she is actually at the disadvantage in the examination.
Particularly those from East Coast - Kelantan and Terengganu, and East Malaysia - Sarawak, who speaks in very very very very very Different Malay.
Not surprising that they would write this in their essay:
Kamek suka gilak makan Manok.
The essay if send to any other state would earn a big underline over the entire sentence and a question mark.
The fact is that rural Malays speak in gramatically incorrect BM and some other places uses very different diction. Kamek = saya, Gilak = sangat. Manok = ayam.
And the federalisation of our examination system will actually put them in greater disadvantage.
Chinese on the other hand like me, we speak in proper BM, although some would be not fluent, but it is correct BM.
And it is easier to learn something right, if you learn it the right thing from the start.
To ask them to speak in BM baku is actually very difficult.
(Part 2 - Science in BM or English?)
Friday, December 14, 2012
Some of his talking points were so inspiring.
While I am not convinced that we can succeed in changing the way the society function after more than 100 years of capitalism, I do share the same passion and belief that something must be done.
Truth is that individualism is the default mode of surviving in today's world.
What Prof Yunus's Grameen Bank is that the society itself should perform some altruistic actions to correct itself.
Here are some of the highlights of the long speech which are points that I considered as;
Ideas worth sharing.
When the famine was raging- it was 1974- it felt terrible to be teaching elegant theories of economics in the classroom and then walk out and see people dying of hunger. Not one, not two, but hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands. What kind of society are we? What kind of knowledge that we feel so proud about? It is empty knowledge, an empty shell. So I thought, I’ll just be a human being and see if I can be of use to somebody. I got involved with tiny little things. My ambition was to be of assistance to at least one person, even for a day. If I could do that, I would be happy
So again, charity is not just about giving money. It’s about enabling people to unleash their capacities, whatever they have, and through my work I’ve seen how human beings are packed with unlimited capacities, every single one of them. Even the child born in the streets has the same unlimited potential as the child born in the palace. No difference. The only thing is those born in situations of neglect and indifference never could open that valuable gift they carry with them, could never know that they had such a wonderful precious gift inside them because society never helped them, or told them they had that gift. So they couldn’t unwrap it to see what they had. They died without ever knowing the wonderful thing they had
But what do we do today? We leave it to the governments to solve the problems. I say citizens are much more powerful than the government, because governments have their limitations. They cannot work outside their framework. It takes time for them to build things. But we citizens are free. We can do things overnight if we wish to. But we don’t because the theory says we’re not supposed to do that. Theory says that if you want to do something to help others, you have to step out of the business. You have to go into the charity world. You have to create a foundation. You can’t do it in this business world.
If we do not imagine a world that we want to live in, we can’t get the world we want. First we must imagine where we are going, our destination. I don’t have to consult anybody, it’s my world. It’s my dream world and I want to work for it. And if we all do that, we’ll create it.
If I had done that wish list, my number one wish would be a world where there would be no poor people. It’s such a humiliating experience for humankind to be poor. Why should anybody be poor?
Saturday, December 08, 2012
Some have 2 wives. One after another dies before you. Saddening.
All in all
Human who are not well physically, and looking up at another human, in form of a doctor, to make them well.
Thursday, December 06, 2012
Sunday, December 02, 2012
Saturday, December 01, 2012
What is your ambition? Question that the teachers would ask the students, year in year out in school.
The smarter ones, like those in top classes, mostly will answer
Saya Bercita-cita menjadi Doktor, atau Saintis, atau Jurutera.
How many of them, even upon reaching Form 5 - Form 6, at the age of 17-18, knows what actually they are signing up for? What is the job of a Doctor?
Is it true that if you want to help people you should be a doctor?
Parents all want their children to be doctors.
Highly respected. Noble job. Really?
Stainless steel rice bowl. Unaffected by world economy? Is it?
Good money. Little work, a lot of money? True?
Oh then who is going to be teacher, who is going to be police, architects, etc.etc.
All the underperforming people?
I have two friends who dropped out of medical school in first and second year respectively.
Now both of them ended up doing something else. I am sure luring in their mind somewhere is that - What If? I could have been? If only?
The fact is, life is really very short.
If we worry every other day, thinking back of what if? life would be better I am not this and that? I should have taken this and that? I should not let go this and that?
Then whats the point? really.
Happiness is the key.
Let us not making life anymore complicated.
Being a doctor requires you to be focus.
Being a doctor requires you to be focus on being good in things that you should be good at.
If you cant do it, do something else. Really.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Highly emotional game for me.
We totally lost the game from the begining till the end, oh well most part of it.
I think I wouldnt go into detail on each and every thing I see wrong in the game. Who am I to comment right?
The funny thing is that when we lost, everyone just, lose it.
When we win, datukship accorded.
I just love to see Malaysia plays. Be it football (oh well, the best is to watch a good team of our country la) Badminton etc etc.
One of my fondest moment in childhood, that I can remember was to wake up and watch the Commonwealth Games KL 1998, and cut newspaper article regarding the results, and follow the super rare games like lawnbowl, dunno wat wushu, sync diving, etc.
Anyhow, win or lose, as long as there's a fighting spirit among the players,
then there's a reason for us to cheer.
As a country.
It is the team that we cheer for. It is not necessary the winning team that only we cheer for.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Sunday, November 25, 2012
For millionaires, yes I like!
Friday, November 23, 2012
Friday, November 16, 2012
You would only know, how much you dont know, when you go for an exam.
Did I just confuse you again? Ha ha ha.
- Plato Ang-
Study la, blog blog blog.
Saw this a few weeks ago otw to work.
So cute right?
Go school so happy. Got daddy bring bring. Ha ha ha.
(For critics: This and all the babies stuffs are all in my playbook. Ha ha ha. Dont like go play far far. My blog I like la write watever! LOL)
Ok ang. Back to boobs. I mean books. haha.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Sunday, November 11, 2012
So scared la...
Thursday, November 08, 2012
I have done 6 postings - Surgery, Obs&Gynae, Medical, Paeds, Orthopedics and Accident&Emergency (in chronological order)
Well, if you ask me which one I enjoyed the most, it would be Orthopedics - Paeds - A&E - Medical - Surgery last and the least of course the hole medicine (with no offense ahaha).
Try to follow up your patient. If not, you would not know the real diagnosis, in your entire life.
Wednesday, November 07, 2012
Reading is studying with no impending exam.
Studying is reading for an impending exam.
I think it is having a reserved luxury carpark space that defines a successful man. Lol.
4. As I was driving along the road to makan: MO already mah!!
It is physiological impossible to drive fast when radio is playing Richard Marx's Right Here Waiting For You or Air Supply's Goodbye
What if a real disaster happens at the same time? It would be a double disaster. :))
If I give u medicine, compare to I give u operation, which one u think u need more talking?
Monday, November 05, 2012
Screw anatomy. Screw physiology.
It is cultured from young, due to complex background, I need this survive, run and hide before the storm comes.
Everything has been written.
Sunday, November 04, 2012
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
So why you want to be a doctor?
If you are in for the money, you are in the wrong field. Very wrong field.
If you are in for the status, you have long and hard journey to go.
It is very difficult to treat this job as a job and I am seriously serious about this.
Some people call this as a profession, and that we should approach it professionally. Dont really know how to do it.
Anyway, it is very perturbing that all the systems in this world chooses the best among the best to be doctors. And who came up with this seriously?
You can only be a good doctor if you are a good person.
If you treat this as a job, in which you punch in and punch out everyday on time, go home quickly and sit down reading to garner a lot of knowledge, then go for examinations, to pass with flying colours, enthusiastically brushing your skill in surgery, then you will no doubt be a successful doctor, very competitive, very driven. It makes competent doctor no doubt.
But humility and compassionate personality are the other two things that makes a hell lot of difference.
Anyway, this post is not that philosophical. Hahahaha.
Let me just share with you how to be successful in doing sales as a locum doctor.
You must be marketable in terms of outlook. Outlook must be confidently elegant. Hair must be conservatively smart. Coloured spiky hair doesnt sell as much as a conservative side parting. Unless you are doing aesthetic medicine. Spectacles is a must. Tie and stetescope would be a bonus
If you are doing business involving surgery, then wearing a scrub is a plus point. They watch a lot of movies, didnt realise that a PPK also wearing scrubs in the OT.
2. Customer always right.
Treat the patient's first complaint as valid complaint and respond adequately to that. If the fella say he is not well, dont jump yet to ask a train of questions on what is that unwell. Have a feel of his pulse, or pull out your stets and listen (anywhere), and then only ask, where unwell? That would firstly show that he is not saying something stupid needing clarification that you acknowledge that general unwellness as a valid starter, and also it will simply alleviate the general unwellness sometimes, and then we can proceed on a more focus further history and examination later.
My experience so far is that 80% of patient come in see doctor because they felt generally unwell, so who said it is not a valid presenting complain?
3. Acquire some pundit skills.
You must be able to somehow able to predict the progress of the disease that your patient has in order to be a good doctor. For example, if he said that he is dizzy, take our your hand like those chinese sinseh feel the pulse, then add another few light comments:
"Hmm...dizziness hor, sometimes feel like vomiting and not very good appetite isn't it?"
"Yesterday got feel feverish no?"
Who felt dizzy and not feeling like vomiting and can eat as normal? But these predictions is going to stick to his mind that you are damn good, able to not just a doctor that he tells complaints, but you can know his complaints even before he tells you. Win.
Also, must be able to do some prediction. For example if he comes with some swelling of the ankle after a football injury, as we know there is only two outcome forward: It gets more swelling and more pain. Or it doesnt.
So, predict the worst, give treatment but tells him predictions of things that doesnt gets better. What I meant is: you proceed as normal to give painkiller and anti-swelling: and say:
- This one, might (KEY WORLD) get more swollen in 2-3 days time. But it should be okay. Then it will get better.
If in the event that your anti-swelling meds doesnt work, you are still a damn good doctor because you already predict it.
If in the event that the leg is not swollen, the credits goes to you and your super medication.
Like I always say:
We let nature takes it's course.
We take the credit.
4. Treat the mind.
If the patient comes in saying abdominal pain, address the abdomen first. Dont waste time go into getting further history like when it started, how does it feel, shooting/burning/constant/heavy/prickling/radiating/spreading/ all of which is very important according to medical school teaching, but in the mind of the patient, it is the same. pain pain pain.
Point the patient to the couch.
Put your expensively trained hand on the stomach, feel feel a bit. Percuss a bit, auscultate a bit, altho it makes not much of a use in clinical point of view, but it is very magically marketable to the patient.
Then, only proceed with your history and examination. The patient felt more secured that you didnt forget about his main chief complaint. And that you address it first.
5. Reputation advertisement.
Probably most important thing in GP. When you talk, you must show that you care. Occasional eye contacts and addressing the other family members as well, not just the patient. In the concept of advertisement, you must strive to get the message across, as widespread as possible, that you are a good fella. Also, this would make sure that when they go out of the room, the family member re-inforce the belief that you are a good fella to the patient.
When more than 1 person say you are good, it is more likely that you are good, according to marketing theory.
I think I can make much more money selling stuffs. You too the same.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
You have served me well for past 6-7years.
Why you left at one of the most important juncture of my journey?
Remember the days we travel across the world? You are fatter than youe other colleagues but it is ok. You fit well into my life.
Right now, there is so much in you that letting you go is not an easy option.
The papers, the ebooks, the ********** - i mean pictures from all thesr years; all embedded deep in.
I cant blog using other instrument. It doesnt feel the same.
Come on brother dell.
Wake up! Wake up!
Friday, October 26, 2012
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
Monday, October 22, 2012
I was so busy and down in my day 1 moship, because the gap of knowledge is so big, the learning curve is so steep and time seemed not enough.
Just as I was about to give up on today, and brushed it off as another bad day of my life, this msg came:
(I cant printscreen)
X - Hi. Are you there?
Me - ? What did I do wrong boss?
X - Just wanted to say thanks for treating my grandma a few days back
Me - Hahahah. Me?
X - Yup. She had a small cut on the finger on Friday night
Me: Yeoh? Lin?
X - Yong.
Me - Oh, ya...nice auntie.
X - She is so happy with u.
Me - She is examplary patient
X - Going on and on about you. Driving me nuts
Me - I feel good treating nice auntie like her. Seldom do HPC randomly, but decided to do one la since she is so kind and friendly.
X - I know!! Just wanna say thanks. Dr Ang from Penang, very very polite and kind bla bla bla
Me - So it is ur auntie! I tot it is my inlaws testing me. So I pretend!! Hahahaha!!!
X - No it is not my auntie. My maternal grandma!!! Flesh and Blood, hahaha. Really thankful she met such a good doctor like u. Shes sooooo happy. Think you made her day for many days on :)
Me - Hahahaha.
No, auntie you made my day.
Sometimes we do alot of good things, but no one recognises us.
But it takes a great satisfaction, when you are treating a patient of complete stranger, who turns out to be one of your friends/boss's relatives, and they speak highly and thankfully of u.
Really made my day.
And really, I do random HPC for all patients above 50 I see in A&E.
Not knowing you are diabetic is just unaccetable in this current medical advancement.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Recently, one of the human rights watcher NGO was under heavy investigations for receiving funding from overseas, and the government claims that it might be an attempt by foreign powers to destabilise the country to doom us all. Why all the foreign powers are so interested in my funny country? Because we are in the middle of China-India sea trade? Or isit we control the Straits of Malacca?
The anti-establishment groups all cry foul saying that the government is against this particular NGO because the NGO is anti government.
Which NGO is pro government if you are a human rights NGO? Funny. and if government not supporting your cause, who will give u money if not of some overseas funding?
Can you write a letter seeking funding from Kedai Kopi Ah Leng? Just to remain locally funded.
I am not joking, seriously.
Lately, one Sabahan lawyer who was caught trying to smuggle in 16 million SgDollar to Malaysia and money trails shown millions in US, HK and Sg dollars been channelled across the world then finally to this lawyers' Swiss account.
He alleged that he is holding the money for Musa Aman, the Chief Minister of Sabah. Then, tong cheng tong cheng, all the subsequent investigations cleared Musa Aman, because the money was said to be a political donation for UMNO Sabah not for Musa's personal use. No, I am not trying to say the investigation is not fair, well i dont know, but the thing is....they said because is political donation, it is halal no need investigate.
Funny no? This RM40 million, first which not only we dont know comes from where or who, or how, also we dont know how and why it travels from many many foreign firms to many many British Virgin Island's firms then ended up to a timber trader in Hongkong who said it was Musa Aman's money and actually it belongs to a political party, and it is halal????
No kidding! My country's highest leader said no need to ask where is the source, this is normal because the opposition also got political donations. They also never disclose sources. But but but....RM40 million political donation which travels across the globe to Sabah UMNO? Some millionaire sold off entire business to fund political party but refused to be known therefore moves the money across the world?
Do they know, or I am confused, of the meaning of money laundering?
I am not joking serious shit.
There is now a new summon system called the AES. The government pasang camera all over the country. My opposition leader is complaining two things. One is the tender for this project is not transparent. Some crony companies got the contract and pasang all plus get a big chunk for first dunno how many summons. True, I do agree the arrangement and the agreement is a bit lopsided. But that is not funny.
The second thing that he complains of is funny. No kidding. He said that the government could easily earn back the RM500 cash the government gave out on the BR1M programme for the poor income family, from this AES thing.
Am I missing the point here? The summon will only be issued if you break the law am I wrong?
Erm., I dont understand what is so wrong. Just follow law and dont get the summon. Funny la. Another thing which is funny to me is that dont we all know the AES is already in place all over the country in form of policeman. The difference is that now the AES summon money will go to government. Last time it is flat rate goes to the hardworking human AES.
Haih, no joke.
I think my country is very funny. Funny leaders across the political divide. I cant read news that often. I get depressed easily.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
One of the most interesting line I have heard this year:
Sorry Najib. It is not "Janji Ditepati".
"In nursing, half the battle is won by just being kind"
I dont know, sorry if this sounds absurd, sometimes I wonder why some people still at the job if the rage is uncontrollable.
We are in this line, definitely not because of money. Our effort and risk vs money-earned graph do not tally at all.
We are in this line, mostly because we want to feel good in serving, helping and because it is a noble job.
Then why angry, or more acccurately, i mean why angry so often?
There are certain things we can get angry at, certain things that we can disgusted with, and I know everyone has their moments when you just lose it.
But I think if we constantly, everyday, lose it, then what is the point. Seriously what is the point.
I get very disgusted at myself when I lose it and being rude to patient.
To think about it, if I felt dizzy and pain, I would go and see a doctor too.
Hmm, insaf already, dont want to scold anyone.
But sometimes, you know, we all will lose it once a while.
Funnily, Human, predictably and irrationally, treats strangers the best.
I always judge another person's character by how he treats a total stranger.
Someone who you does not have any need for, or fear for.
-another of my too early for pm shift, too late to sleep, rant.
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Saturday, October 06, 2012
I would like to retort that this is not just in medicine, but in everywhere if we look closer. Teachers were not as good as the olden days. Lawyers are not as sharp as yesteryears.
Academic inflation and knowledge deflation is everywhere. Howevery, I do agree that we cannot deny that me and other young doctor's competency level is dropping, but this problem is not just exclusively in this country.
Even in the UK or US.
Well, my take is that this phenomenal is inevitable. We tend to slip back a little as we progress.
And more importanntly, the psychology of human grandiosity.
It is a normal human behaviour to think that you are better than others when you are at certain position. Doctors, especially.
Ask yourself, do you think that you are better than your junior houseman?
Your senior also thought that way. Your junior will also think that they are better than their juniors.
I think all of us have to take a step back and rethink of the more important point here:
Safety in Practice.
We must culture a safe working environment, where asking question is acceptable.
Saying I dont know is normal.
Learning attitude is more appreciated than guessing the answer.
My hope is that when I say I dont know, the other person would not say where you graduate from?
Or how on earth you can become a doctor?
There is no way back now my dear friends, saying those things wont help.
There is gaps of knowledge in all of us.
This is especially true to the people that working in specialised field. Like ENT. Like Eye. Like Skin.
You actually didnt say I dont know, because you havent been explored in the area that you dont know.
It is easy to ask question, because you are scooping from your comfort zone of pool of your knowledge.
It is very difficult to be bad in things that you do everyday,
Be humble. Be nice. Be humane.
Encourage safety in practice. Accept I dont know. Teach. Not preach.
Friday, October 05, 2012
Tuesday, October 02, 2012
Scary as in, at that time, you are the most religious person that you would ever known.
I remembered one time I got lost while hiking on my own in Moongate trail Penang. People that know this trail would understand why. It is one of the said to be haunted trail.
I lost my way despite hiking there, like 100 times. And it was already dark while I m still in the jungle/bush/trees (after been to Sarawak then you know what actually constitute a "jungle")
Oh well, today I want to share another scary moment I had recently.
I wear contact lenses for futsal.
I only have one pair of lenses, since.....
.... 5-6 months ago,
and I am still wearing it.
It got harden actually but...hehehe...I just dont care.
So on that fateful day, I wear it to play la.
Then had a small knock with someone who hit the eye a bit.
The contact lense broken inside my eye, and then I had a blurred vision for the night.
It is damn SCARY OKKKKKK.
I thought to myself the whole night; that would be it.
Career, life, family...
The next day, I referred myself to Eye doctors, they see see see...
look at the cornea....slit test...see see seee
and said it was a minor corneal abrasion, advise me against wearing contact lenses for a few weeks.
It is scary.
( Recovered liau...dont worry wont use contact lenses anymore for forseeable future) Playing football with specs now.
Friday, September 28, 2012
There are tremendous distinctive features between the two verbs above.
We always hear conflicts between nurses vs doctors, vs ppk's, vs lab technicians, vs radiographers, and what not.
I might sound a bit of holier than thou but this is generally the reason why I seldom argue with nurses or ppk's.
Apart of victimitis theory which I wrote umpteen times before - Work ; this is about the nobility of the job.
Well, don't you agree that it is kind of paradoxical, that when you are doing a noble job, you are not working. You are actually, serving.
Now, we juniorest doctors are always unhappy with the PPKs (PPK is the person who was employed to do some odd jobs / housekeeping job, like a Porter, in the ward, for example sending patients to another place, collecting food, sending blood samples to labs, etc)
Me too, when I started working, was always annoyed by PPK who to me did not do their work at all.
Not just the PPK, the nurses, the lab techs, the radiograhers, who are supposingly be our supporting staffs, when they are not as supportive, or working as hard as we are (well, everyone including Prime Minister thinks that he is overworked) then we cant help it but to be angry.
For example when we ask for the patient to be sent to Xrays at night, it would never be done. PPK not free. Then you find them sleeping. Then you rightfully felt angry isn't it?
Of course you can, you should.
I wouldn't say that I am like a priest like dat, dont feel angry, and ever forgiving.
Probably I was also one of the lazy people and rather useless when I started working at younger days, so I can kind of understand them easier than some other people.
My lack of anger towards them has to do with my understanding of the enormous distinction between serving and working.
When your job, is associated with nobility, best example ,as a Doctor, you are not actually working per say.
You are serving. And according the Maslow, you are motivated by self actualisation, which drives you work up to or even beyond the expectations you have for the nobility you are associated with. (no I just come out with this crap myself)
What I meant is that when you are a PPK, you dont have that nobility associated with you, oh well, most of them. I mean say you worked so hard during the night time, and by right you should be sleeping the next day, but you are taking care of your children. How are you going to explain to your wife, darling I am helping doctors saving life therefore I am very sleepy?
But if you are a doctor, even if you mistakenly went into the ladies, it is still okay probably when they think that you had been saving lives all night, it is out of fatigue. The same is unimaginable for the ppk.
That is the reason why you get really committed, really serving, Nurses and PPKs in district hospitals. Because in the close small community, they all still have the nobility intact with them. People will still let a lady who is donning nurse uniform to cut queue in supermarket, the respect to their jobs is still there.
But unfortunately, we see shifts in paradigm regarding the nurses and sometimes, but rarely, even doctors in big cities. I can sadly say that we no longer have that nobility associated with the job of nurses anymore.
Then, it is very difficult to ask them to work as hard as a doctor. It is just a job only.
But of course, the flip side of the argument, you are paid to do a good job.
If you cant do it, leave.
Oh well, of course this is valid in economy reality, cant do it, leave.
But if you stand in their shoes, you see it another way.
Perhaps, the saying, No one is not lazy all the time. Lending the words from someone; We all have our moments.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Dearest PM Najib;
I have some simple request/suggestion la in terms of if you would have ask me where to spend money which makes most the difference in people's life in my opinion.
I think if we put more money to hospital without a directed approach, nothing going to come out. The one needing most money is always the ones having the least kickbacks so it is the one that no one wants to talk about or take it further.
Examples are aplenty. Just go to any Diabetic patient, asked them what is Diabetes, what they know about how to take care of themselves.
Most likely you get very disappointing answers.
My point Mr PM, is when it comes to allocations, we tend to give the most money to the tangible goods. For example, the late but better than never Hospital Shah Alam, or the far from civilisation but better than none Pusat Jantung Sarawak. These are multi BILLIONs projects and dont get me wrong, they are necessary but question: are we stepchilding other priorities?
Pardon me but my negativity and anti-establishment instinct is telling me that all these constructions, material developments all of those involving contracts usually have kickbacks for certain people and therefore in Malaysia where money politics are halal, we are more than happy to have that kind of development. Dont shoot me yet, this is personal, and I agree to disagree.
I just felt that if I am a politician, why not? I get a new hospital for my rakyat therefore I can sleep well at night, I am using none of my money, but most importantly, I get a new, good friend. We cannot deny rumours la, when the two tenderer who profited from the projects I mentioned above are full with political connections.
I just felt strongly that because it is a health related issue. You can build a 100 storey high building and give it to your son to build I have not much of an issue as compared to you spending more money, with slower progress, and poorer result, when you are building a hospital for Shah Alam.
Just, too, much. Healthcare is to me a human right.
Well done if I havent offended you by now.
Back to the issue of Diabetic patients, you see why I digress to the issues of building hospitals and constructions etc is because I think if I spend 1million on educating 10000 diabetic patients in Sarawak, I will see less heart attack, less strokes, less leg amputations, longer lifespan, better family health and so on, better than spending 1 million to buy these 10000 patients a new diabetic medication from certain contractors pharmaceutical company.
And the reason why we are not putting resources in patient education, is because this cannot be done under contract to another fella. It is not a contract per say.
And how I would need to spend the 1 million? Just give RM100 to every Community Nurse (you dont even need doctor to do this) who are able to make the patients all understand their disease, their medications, their monthly check up of blood markers showing good sugar control and etc. I think that is more rewarding than, contracting newly invented medications because only the well, educated people who understands their disease can benefit from the new medications.
And if the way we measure doctors to patients ratio for Election purpose is just the total number of citizens divided by number of doctors, then we are getting just the numbers right.
I think if building new hospital is too much, or buying expensive machines is too difficult, or getting specialists to work in districts are too inhumane, at least we make sure the journey to transfer patient to our main hospital is acceptable. The hospitals' ambulance is at the state of sadness la. Its shaky like rollercoaster, new ambulance not working, cannot complain as the company managing the assets are rumoured to be politically connected, how la. Very sad la...dahla sebagai doktor hospital tak boleh selamatkan nyawa, nak hantar pi hospital besar pun tak leh. Geram no?
If you want me to ask question is that I want to know what is our future healthcare plan? Every year we spent so much money, and we are still spending a lot of money here and there even in the hospital u can see our medications are sometimes more expensive ones than the private hospital, but I think our prioritisation is getting it all wrong.
The healthcare must be fair and no kickbacks/unfairness can be tolerated lo, when it comes to life, the one and only one to everyone, to you to me to the uncle sitting in the bus, i think kenot la with this kind of progress.
Your governement intended to do ONE CARE - i fully support integrated plan with the private, but we need reassurance that this is a well planned, no close suspicious tender thing around the corner. I know it is difficult because as someone in power to decide where to spend the money, the predators are all over you.
People dont come to you to just say hie. They want something.